This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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