ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
you had me at cake vodka
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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