I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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