His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
