it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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