why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
