After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
