allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Quick, to the slutcave!
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
