I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
