I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
