How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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