i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
