Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
