Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
