And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
