mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
We left the knife in your bed.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
