Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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