he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....