He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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