My balls are so social today.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
