im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
