covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
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Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
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If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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