That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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