All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Damn victory sex feels great
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
