well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
you win again, gameday.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
