margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
