So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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