Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Randomize
