Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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