there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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