from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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