we have pet lesbian snakes
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
