best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
