I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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