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I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
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