she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
