Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize