I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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