Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
jump out the window naked night went bad
Shame is for Republicans.
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