I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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