but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
