I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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