I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
