Rock
Scissors
Fuck
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I intend to get homeless drunk
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
