When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
