Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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