Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
