What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Panties = found
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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