just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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