just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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